Friday, August 19, 2011

......the life journey is still mine!

Hey guys, how is everyone especially abang zack, abang John, Abang Numan, Abang Dam, Abang Daus, Abang Rocwk and others? Well back to the story, recently I realized a things which is no matter what or who I've in my life, the life journey is still mine so what's the point worrying don't have someone in my life? Perhaps, is good to have someone in our life to share our happy and sad but at the end of the day they not going to follow wherever we go, especially our last permanent home under 6 feet!

For me, no one going to change me nor know me well except myself! Sometime, I'm envy seeing those couple having a nice and happy relationship but I came to understand and always told myself that my life is different from them. Even I can't get a good relationship like them but I always happy, pray and help them as much as I can so that they will have long time relationship. As for me, I always hope and wish that how good if there's a person who I love the most hug me, lay my head on their chest and whisper to me "don't worry pat, everything will be alright. I'm here for you!" At the end of the day, it just an imagination of mine and I don't put too much hope on that because never aspect everyone like I want right.

I don't know why, I just simply happy when my friend happy with their partner in their life. Anyway, there's much more for me to learn. I'll stop learning when I in my permanent home under 6th feet. Yesterday I saw a friend of mine who kept asking me when I'm going to marry hahahah, I just laugh! I don't want to marry not because I'm gay but there's another reason which I will safe for last means tell later. I just don't want to ruin anyone life when I know my own condition and where it will leads to so better better avoid from it.

How I wish I want to be kids back to my mum like when I was small that always hug me when I'm cry, when I was in pain and when I was sick! But I proud of myself being a big boy now and handle everything myself and being independent. Well, even there's a lot who live independently and younger than me. Whenever I face a problem or pain, I though I'm having a hard time but I'd came to realize that there are people who facing problem more worse than mine and that's when I put myself in their show to feel their pain as well.

I easily get a long with people no matter what age are they as long as they can talk to me. I'm a kind of person who if you talk and smile, I'll reply but if you show you ugly face then I've no comment other than keep quite and being myself. People always said that I'm good in attract people and know how to start a conversation, am I? well, it born in myself I guess, perhaps, I learn myself.

Oh yeah, I almost forget the part which I wanted to talk. Last couple of day ago, I heard that some people talking at the back of me. Well, sometime I appreciate people who talk back of me because they like to point out my weakness where I can change it but sometime I just let it be because I know they don't have work to do so I cannot help them out, I prefer to do my work rather wasting my time by arguing with them. If you know the not going to change their attitude so what's the point right?

guys, is love will make a person crazy? Hahaha well, it did! Safar getting crazy, he could borrow handphone credit from his friend just to sms me. He's really crazy and yes I know he love me sincerely but I've to remind myself something that might get him upset so is better I keep being friend with everyone.

Recently, I found myself getting too tired, exhausted, my back head are keep pain like hell. At first I though it just migraine but my thoughts was wrong after I received my medical report last few days from Ampang Puteri Hospital. It was quit surprised me but nevermind that's what god wanted right so let it be because he know what's the better for me. Even it makes me feel sad but I still happy because at least I've been go through as much as I can and achieved some of my dreams though. I don't know when I'll reach my time and credits to Dr. Mei Ling who helped me a lot to go through this. At first I though not to write this at here but where else I can put out my feelings and for sure I'll not going to tell my parents about this. They already burdened with too much of problem and I don't want to add their burden with this.


Anonymous said...

what happened Pat..?? are u ok??

JoHn said...

nak tanye soalan yang same...


Anonymous said...

mmm aper dah jadi ?? tue la org dah pesan pakai Liberes ..pasti beres semua masalah .. hehe ..get well soon *tetiba

Prince Patrick said...

Zack: Don't worry bang Zack, my brain swollen and contain of fluids. Thre's no more space for my brain to breath inside my head, it sticked together with my head. Madecine, only as pain killer, surgery 99% coma. So nothing can be done :)

John: Hahahah don't worry abang John, everything is fine :)

Numan: Hahaha thanks bang Numan, really appreciate that :)

Naga Sepi said...

is it that serious?? going to pray that all is going to be well again :))


Prince Patrick said...

DAus: Don't worry bang, everything will be alright :)